JAYMZ CLEMENTS, MUSIC EDITOR
Jaymz wants to go to ten sideshows, many of which are on the same days. He’s definitely also going to Splendour, so good luck to you and your eardrums, sir.
1. PULP: Friday July 29 – Festival Hall
Why? ‘Cos it’s fucking Pulp, bitches. I wanna disco 2000 like a mofo. You can be my sister, and my mother. We’ll all meet up and party harder than Kate Moss in 2002.
2. THE HIVES: Wednesday July 27 – Festival Hall
Why? ‘Cos it’s The fucking Hives! THE greatest rock band in the world. The Hives are here to save your soul: let them. Oh god, let them.
3. MODEST MOUSE: Wednesday July 27 – Prince Bandroom
Isaac Brook is a singular fellow. I await the new Modest Mouse album like Tony Montana awaited riches and loads of coke. And killing Robert Loggia.
4. THE VACCINES: Wednesday August 3 – The Hi-Fi
I got into their album massively, but missed them at SXSW, so, as highly touted as they come, it will be interesting to see if they’re any good at all.
5. ELBOW: Wednesday July 27 – Palace Theatre
Their new album Build A Rocket Boys! is yet another statement from Elbow that, yes, they are indeed one of the finest British bands of their generation. Live, they’re amazing… so it makes sense that we should all go and see them.
6. NOAH & THE WHALE: Wednesday August 3 – The Corner
Simply so I can yell, ‘Oi, you mopey muppet, what’s the matter? The missus break it off? Oh. Right. As you were.’
7. GLASVEGAS Monday July 25 – The Hi-Fi
No homo, but they remain one of the most mind-bending bands in existence. Like Muse without the wank. Or the Kate Hudson banging.
8. WARPAINT: Tuesday July 26 – Corner Hotel
Their tunes are as hot as they are.
9. DOES IT OFFEND YOU, YEAH?: Friday August 5 – Prince Bandroom
Last time I saw them, the room was full of fluro-toting indie kids. Now those fluro-toting indie kids all like dubstep and have heroin habits, so I’m looking forward to seeing how the band themselves have changed.
10. THE KILLS: Thursday July 28 – Prince Bandroom
All I ever want to do when I hear The Kills is get all up and down with Alison, to the point where Gal Music Editor looks askance at me before popping me in the jaw when I play The Kills.
TYSON WRAY, DANCE EDITOR
Tyson famously hates guitar music. He’s super picky.
1. MODEST MOUSE: Wednesday July 27 – Prince Bandroom
Modest Mouse filled up 95% of my 128MB MP3 player in Year 7. To be completely honest I’ve hardly listened to them since leaving high school and they’ve barely released anything worth listening to within the last decade, but considering I was underage both of their previous two tours of Australia I’m still waiting to hear these suave motherfuckers knock me out with a rendition of Dramamine. Here’s hoping for a setlist from the past.
2. MOODYMANN
Wait. What! Whattaya’ mean he’s not on the lineup?
AMELIA SCHMIDT, ARTS & ONLINE EDITOR
I might be going to Splendour, but more likely I’ll be going to sideshows. Also, I’m a girl. So neh.
1. JAMES BLAKE: Tuesday July 26 – Prince Bandroom
Tyson hates James Blake, and Jaymz thinks his music is for girls, or something. He does funny things to me and makes me have some feelings, so I would definitely like to get my minimalist soul dubstep on with him. If you know what I mean.
2. PULP: Friday July 29 – Festival Hall
Jarvis has been a dancing icon of mine for a very long time. He’s somewhere in between John Cleese and Ian Curtis but with a bit of Bob Fosse thrown in. He taught me how to be loose and also jesus, it’s Pulp, OK? No more explaining.
3. GOMEZ: Thursday August 4 – Palace Theatre
I have always felt that Gomez fans were way older than I was but you know, whatever. I love them and even though everyone at this show will be like 30 or above, I will know all the words to all their songs and feel like a huge dork and it will be totally, totally awesome. Sounds like not doing enough drugs and reading too many books as a teenager.
4. DJ SHADOW: Sunday July 31 – Palace Theatre
Of course this will be awesome. Radiohead led me to DJ Shadow, enough said.
5. NOAH AND THE WHALE: Wednesday August 3 – The Corner Hotel
Sure, it’s in the whole Mumford & Sons, banjos, beards and barleyhorn contemporary folk for rich kids in big cities bag, but I do genuinely think that N&TW make beautiful music. Swoony.
6. WILD BEASTS: Thursday July 28 – The Corner Hotel
Saw these guys at Laneway Festival a few years ago and not only are they lean, beautiful European men-types but their music is complex and abstract and awesome and angular and I like it, and their cheekbones, a lot.
7. FOSTER THE PEOPLE: Wednesday July 27 – The Hi-Fi
To be honest, I’m not a huge fan – yet – but I’ve been recommended FTP so heavily by people that I’m keen to see them live and be converted. Don’t hate me. I’m an arts editor, OK? Jeez.
8. KANYE WEST: Wednesday July 27 – Readings Bookstore
This isn’t happening. But, um, I wish it was.
