The End of Time, as listed on the MIFF website, is accompanied by an image of a particle detector from CERN’s multi-billion dollar Large Hadron Collider. The description of the film suggests the film would be an exposition on “the nature of time”. I requested tickets on the basis that this would be a fascinating scientific documentary on the Large Hadron Collider and what it has revealed about the concept of time in our universe. Instead, I sat through two hours of bongheads talking about volcanoes and Detroit.
For a while, I considered the possibility that The End of Time felt so long and drawn out because it was some kind of postmodern ironic critique of time, in that by wasting the audience’s time it was teaching us about time. No. Turns out it was just boring. The beginning of the film sees the documentary crew visit the Large Hadron Collider and completely waste the time of the engineers and scientists there. Every question put to the scientists – and believe me there aren’t nearly enough – is bookended by ten minutes of boring, fragmented scenes of mechanical equipment without explanation of what the equipment actually does.
To be fair, a lot of my disdain for the film is because I was a victim of my own preconceived hope for it, and many of the natural landscapes used throughout the film are beautiful. But sitting through The End of Time is like being forced to hang out with a bunch of 15-year-olds getting high for the first time, and when they pass the bud to you, you’re left with nothing but tobacco and the roach. Time will tell whether The End of Time is well received, but it certainly didn’t feel timeless.
