Like many 20-something Melburnians, I was born at the Former Royal Women’s Hospital in Carlton. Like some others, I became infatuated with the ghost-like (and rumoured to be haunted) building remains after the hospital’s relocation to Parkville in 2008. Unlike most, I have an unusual obsession with the ‘70s and even own a pair of Starfire 500 roller skates for no legitimate reason other than the fact that roller discos are my ultimate dream and I want to be prepared. The announcement of a roller jam in Melbourne was truly a dream come true.
As part of Melbourne Music Week, the event took place in the basement of the Former hospital. The main floor had been transformed into a roller rink, and skate hire was included with entry. To the side of the bar were two hospital beds cast in an eerie green light (but they were useful if you needed a rest). The corridors to the bathroom were another space with neon green lighting and an old typewriter. Disco tunes were blasting in between the live sets, and the MC was literally wearing a giant disco ball costume topped off by a natural afro. On the dance floor you had a mix of very skilled and unskilled skaters. A few girls were able to do a lot of fancy moves on their skates. There was an issue with the small size of the rink, which meant it became crowded very quickly. Not to mention the surface wasn’t completely smooth – a lot of people stacked it, but that’s a part of the fun.
I tired out pretty quickly, but there was plenty of space to sit and enjoy the music. Eventually, I called it a day and took my skates off and went to leave with my friend. However, I was stopped by security who told me I had to return my skates. I explained they were my own and he refused to believe me, accusing me of being a skate thief. I literally had to pull up an old photo of when I first got the skates before he would let me leave. My love of ‘70s paraphernalia had gotten me in trouble, but if there’s one thing the Roller Jam reminded me of, it’s that it’s a love worth having. If loving you is wrong, I don’t want to be right.
BY TAMARA VOGL
Photo by Lucas Dawson
Loved: That a lot of people dressed up like I did.
Hated: The not-so-smooth roller rink surface.
Drank: Water.
