Mel & Sam: The Platonic Human Centipede
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Mel & Sam: The Platonic Human Centipede

This event is part of the 2024 Melbourne International Comedy Festival.

You can love someone so much you think the sun shines out of their ass… but what about respecting them enough to stitch your mouth to their anus, so that they never have to call you on speed dial again – ‘cos you’re just there! “Hey girl!” Where’s the cabaret about that?

Join multi-award-winning queer comedy duo Mel & Sam in this side-splitting, synth-soaring selection of songs and sketches to champion the one thing we love most – the unsung duos of the modern world!

Because you know Hamish & Andy. You know Thelma & Louise. But the girls are about to blow your minds with how many ass-eating duos are really out there.

What about Boomer Dads & Standing On Decks With Their Arms Crossed? How about Hillary Duff & Vocal Warm Ups On ‘La’? What about 12-Year-Old Boys On The Internet & Telling Sam She Looks Like Minecraft Steve? How about Commercial Musical Theatre Productions & Casting Football Stars As Their Leading Man? ‘Cos those are duos too and god damn it, they’re getting a ballad! (Tonight’s production will be performed by Shane Crawford.)

With an all-original soundtrack featuring songs including: ‘#NotAllFlowerpotMen: Bill and Ben’s Lament’, ‘I Love When Women Breathe’, ‘Sophie’s Choice: Panini Or Traditional?’ and many more, this turbo-charged hour of musical madness will leave you fed, frightened and seeing double.

Because whilst the girls may have never seen The Human Centipede, the takeaway from that film is clear – there is aaaaaalways more you can do to show your other half you love them.

Dad, you probs won’t get most of this one.

Unless you watch it from your deck.