When did you start playing guitar?
Probably around 2003. My big brother kind of got me into alternative radio punk around then. He loved AFI and wore fishnets and eyeliner, and I thought he was pretty cool. He was a real shit to my parents, so they sent him to live with my uncle in South Dakota. They are really religious and thought this evil music turned him into a demon child and they didn’t want the same to happen to me so they took all my Green Day and Nirvana CDs away and gave me a guitar.
What was the first music to inspire you to play and write music, and why was that music inspirational?
I discovered the classic shit in middle school: Ramones, Misfits, Dead Kennedys. It’s cliché, but it was eye opening and exciting music and as a reject I identified with it. And besides, for a skinny, smelly kid in a shitty leather jacket there wasn’t really anything else to do besides play in a terrible band.
What’s the best and worst thing about St Louis?
Relatively small town when it comes to punk/hardcore/rock’n’roll. Sometimes gigs are insane, tons of people come and everyone gets wild. Sometimes nobody goes, or people go but they have sticks up their butt and the gig is a drag.
What was your original idea for Lumpy and the Dumpers?
There was no idea. I recorded three cool punk songs all by myself for fun one summer. And I had thought of a really dumb band name that made me laugh. By default I put the two together, had no plan for anything to come of it. And abba zabba, four years later we’re in Australia.
There’s a scatological theme to both your name, and some of your songs. Are you obsessed with bodily functions?
This question blows. I don’t know. People can look at my drawings and read the lyrics and decide for themselves. Just ‘cause I like to take a shit does it mean I’m obsessed with it?
You’ve said that ‘boredom is your main inspiration’. Is that because when you’re bored you have to do something to alleviate the malaise, or because when you’re bored creative ideas flood into your head to fill the void?
Probably the latter. When I sit down and try to draw or write lyrics it just does not happen. The better riffs/lyrics/drawings come spontaneously by accident when there is no pressure to come up with something and I’m just killing time and not thinking about it so hard.
What’s good, and what’s bad about the Dumpers?
Me Dumpers have been friends for many years – buncha morons! They’re really fun to be around, but as musicians they suck total arse. They will play a song right at practice no problem and the next night at the gig completely fuck it up. Just wait Australia, you’ll see how terrible this band is.
What’s the weirdest place that you’ve ever played?
I feel weird playing anywhere but a basement. A punk show at a bar, are you fucking kidding me? Bars are filled with the worst people, regular idiots socialising and getting laid and watching sports and laughing and fucking squeezing the sponge of life man, getting all the juice out living to the fuckin’ fullest with no regrets. And you ask them to donate money to the touring band and they just stare at you or say, “Sorry man, I don’t have any cash” or just completely ignore you.
We played a 420 house show a couple weeks ago, it was just us and some DJs. That was pretty weird. I was expecting tons of baked college kids but instead it was like 70 per cent dads. And no bongs. Just a bunch of dads and some mums. They loved us, especially when we played Louie Louie as “Doobie, Doobie” and Blitzkreig Bop (“Hey ho let’s toke”).
Damn, I just remembered the weirdest gig though. Last summer we played a tiny arse town in Montana called Kalispell at a record store with a band called BRAH. We had found their MySpace and saw they had songs called 2 + 1 = Poo and Finger Fucking Quota, which kept us laughing the whole tour. This guy Connor owned the store and played in that band – he had a flip hat on with a bill that was like a foot long. I am cracking up just thinking about it. And when this band played, during an entire three minute song, Connor took off his bass and picked up a super soaker and walked up to every person in the crowd and squirted them, but in a real casual way, not like super crazy or wild. He’d just walk up, stand there for a second, and then shoot you, then walk away. After their set he mentioned, “Yeah, we’re kind of known for that”. After the gig, some old guy in a wife beater, Kreepers, and with two swastika tattoos bought a shitload of merch from Mongoloid, the band we were on tour with. He claimed he was in a ska band called the Vagina Spiders. Man that town was a trip.
Your shows can be pretty intense. What psychological and physical state do you want your audience to be in by the time you finish playing?
This sounds like a loaded question, like I’m supposed to say THEY GOTTA BE COVERED IN FUCKIN’ BLOOD MAAAAN. But it is way more fun to play to people who are not just standing there.
Who came up with idea for the video for Sex Pit? Did you enjoy writhing around naked in a pool of slime?
Dumper on bass Ben Smith wrote and filmed everything. It was really funny until the shivers came, everyone went upstairs for a smoke break and I’m standing butt arse naked covered in gunk by myself about to get hypothermia in a dark basement. I’m ambivalent about it.
Pitchfork described you as “awesomely gross”. Is that a compliment or insult?
Man, being written about by that shitty enterprise is so embarrassing.
John Lydon said anger is an energy. Are you angry, pissed off or just taking the piss?
Angry and pissed off mean the same thing, are you stupid or just plain dumb?
You did a split 7” with Geelong punk rock band Ausmuteants. What do you like about that band?
They make catchy songs and are a bunch of dummies who are down to clown.
In addition to Lumpy and the Dumpers, you run a tape label (Spotted Race) that puts out some of the more manic/deviant punk rock around. What attributes do you look for in a band to put them on one of your tapes?
“Some of the more manic/deviant punk rock around”…debatable. I just put out stuff I like without really thinking about if it will sell or not, but as luck would have it, a bunch of suckers seem to respect my taste. I’d like to clear the record though, the label is called Lumpy Records and is now more of a record label.
If you had one career aspiration, what would it be?
When I was a young spud in middle school all I really wanted to do was put out records. I guess I am living the dream
If you weren’t in the punk rock scene, what would your ideal job be?
Working in a chip factory would be pretty tight.
Do you reckon Trump’s ascension to the presidency would be a blessing or curse for punk rock?
A curse for every other aspect of life, but man would the punk be LIT.
What are you most looking forward to doing and seeing in Australia?
Besides seeing Tommy T I really haven’t thought about it. If Australia is as wild as Babe: Pig in the City and Romper Stomper make it out to be, then I’ll probably do alright.
BY PATRICK EMERY
