Lisa-Skye is Not Like Other Boys
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Lisa-Skye is Not Like Other Boys

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Tell us about your show,Lisa Skye Is Not Like Other Boys?

The show is a look into my brain which apparently is not so normal. It’s really about me and my soulmate (who happens to be a man.) It’s about our wedding and our life. Its also about, well here is the thing… I’m a goth! I’m one of two goths on the comedy circuit that I know of. The other one, Michael Workmen, well he’s much better than me. Though I have boobs! You don’t see a lot of queer goth women in comedy or really at all.”

 

How do you feel about your performance and sexual identity now that you are marrying a man?

Well I hate the word ‘bi – sexual.’ It implies man and woman so it excludes trannies who I love. There needs to be more tranny love. I like to use the blanket word ‘queer’. I’d use the word bisexual to describe those bogans going to a wife swap. [Lisa impersonates said bogan] ‘I’m not into that faggot shit but I’ll watch Tracy growl at your missus!’ I hate it when girls are like, “You can’t like girls because you have a boyfriend.” I hate those girls that call themselves ‘bisexual’ and pash their girlfriends just to turn on their bogan boyfriends. And yes the only reason I like the vagina is because it makes you titillated! I’m cursed with women. I always fuck it up with girls. My friends think I’m a bit creepy and sometimes I’ve been known as the ‘frill-necked lizard of lady love.’”

 

If you had to use three words to describe Lisa Skye what would they be?

Dawn, French, hate, fucking, snickers, bar. Wait that’s too many words isn’t it? Metronomic, glitter, explosion!”

 

What are other boys like?

Footy and fucking ladies in the vagina. When I think about the conventional boy I think about my brother. For fun on the weekends he shoots animals in the face with a crossbow. We are very different.”

 

Tell me three things most people don’t know about Lisa Skye?

1. I once dated Jared Leto from that terrible band 30 seconds to mars and I raped the shit out of him – however he was not so interested.

2. I once made a cocktail called a Relapse; half a glass of water, a Berrocca and three shots of vodka. It wasn’t very good.

3. The first time I was on television I sang a song about Cartoon Company and after, Marty Monster gave me a hug.”

 

What do you wish you could do that you can’t?

I wish I could be one of those Ricky Martin types with ladies falling all over them. Meanwhile I just have a string of guys that work in IT.”

 

When you were a little Lisa what did you want to be when you grew up?

Looked at. I was an intolerable show pony. Well what has changed?”

 

You shot a man in the face because he was wearing a bear suit. Did he survive?

The statute of limitations is still out on that, so I can’t really talk about it. Let’s just say everything turned out for the best. Yay!”

 

Last words?

Come to my show – you will never look at metronomes the same way again.”