How To Be A Good Patriot with the True Australian Patriots
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How To Be A Good Patriot with the True Australian Patriots

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As the smaftest and most educated member of the group it is my duty to inform you all of the ways to be a good patriot. I think the 3 best ways to be a good patriot for this country is to respect our laws and traditions, come here legally, and honour your mates.

You should always respect the laws of this country and not sharia law. That is our tradition. Do not have a halal butcher for example and halal funds terrorism. Come hear legally and NOT on boats. These people smugglers are bringing them in at alarm rate and they dont even fit crtieria ONE in these rules as when they come here on boats they DON’T RESPCET our rules and traditions. They aren’t us.

The last rule is always honour your mates and this is what is really most important. We know all patriots are here properly and respect the laws and aren’t muslim, but some mates don’t honour other mates. It is not honouring your mates when you accuse them of things they never did. Like if you have a TRUE PATRIOT mate and you accuse him of farting in the last two meetings then you have not honoured him, especially if he didn’t actually do it.

Some people are to ready to chuck their hard earned mates under a BUS and tell them they were farting when it wasn’t them it was actually you who farted. You knew that because I am a heavy-set gentleman that most people would blame me for farting, just ASSUMING that every rotten stink comes from me. It simply is a lie and honestly mate it’s funny how low you have sunk.

In our society thetre are a lot of overweight people struggling with the fact that in addition to all the negative press they get, they also have to deal with being held responisble for smells and bodily noises that aren’t theirs. Sometimes even if someone were to see a dog shit in the park their friends would point and laugh and say “Hey steve don’t shit in the park” and even though you laugh along with them and act like it doesn’t affect you, IT DOES! AND IT HURTS!

Body odor is hard to control for ANYONE let alone someone with an ample frame. On a hot day this smell can get out of control. That isn’t ayone’s fault. Talk to an olympic sprinter and they will stink. It has nothing to do with body size actually.

In addition to feeling bad about the smells it’s hard to get any respect. If I eat a full pizza even though Gary did as well and even though I didn’t even have a lunch. OH LOOK OUT FAT STEVE IS EATING AGAIN! JUST LEAVE ME ALONE! When I go to the shops to get shirts people have to look at me and laugh as if I would never be able to actually fit into that shirt. Brands like Hot Tuna and Mambo don’t even make sizes big enough, nice to know they turned their backs on AUSSIE customers.

It hurts when people make fun of these things you can’t control. And to then be accused of farts I didn’t do, its gutting. I told you all, I never eat eggs. They look like sick-up to me and smell and feel gross I don’t EVER eat them. Name one time I have eaten an egg literally one time and I will buy you a HOUSE. Because if you never, ever seen me eat any eggs, EVER, then why would my farts smell like rotten eggs? It’s because i didn’t fart mate. No way not ever in a meating let alone the last two meetings. You just said i did to impress les and make me look bad in front of her. WHICH IS RUBBISH. You know how much that hurts and I just feel stupid, trying to defend myself against a rotten egg fart that wasn’t me. SHUT UP PLEASE AND PLEASE JUST ADMIT THESE THINGS!

What you need to be a good patriot is to respect your mates because they are just like you. They might look different, have different smells, have to wear big shitty shirts that aren’t cool, they have different lifestyles (eating a lot) but you are all the same in your hearts and deep down you all want the same thing: An australia without islam.

THank you

From Steve

Vice-President (former president and resigned from that by choice)

Trye Australian Patriots.