Beat spoke to EastEnd Cabaret, AKA professional rude girl and ‘deviant diva’ Bernadette Byrne, and her accompanist Victor/Victoria (‘half-mustachioed weirdo’, of ambiguous gender but fine with being referred to as ‘she’). The much adored and award-winning comedy cabaret duo is bringing a new show, Perverts, to MICF 2015. “It’s musical comedy,” says Byrne. “It’s got a whole pile of new songs. And it’s quite rude.” Very rude, according to reports. “We aren’t going out of our way to try and shock. But there are things that happen,” Byrne adds mysteriously. “I talk about the funny side of sex. About things that happen unexpectedly. I do talk about the intimate side of a relationship (and we drink a lot of gin).” Would that be a relationship with Victor/Victoria (henceforth referred to as Victy), perhaps? Byrne denies this although she admits there has been much speculation. “I’ve been trying to get rid of her for 25 years.” “We sleep in the same bed,” notes Victy. “Perhaps we’re dating?” “We share a bedsit in east London. You sleep on the floor most of the time,” Byrne retorts. “There’s only one bed but London is expensive! We’re not together, we just live together. People get confused and there are rumours that we are a couple but she’s just my accompanist.” “Actually we are soul mates,” contradicts Victy. “She couldn’t do the show without me. She needs me to play the instruments.” Are there any power struggles between the two on stage? “I’m the star!” notes Byrne. “But she does step out of line sometimes. She freaks most people out with her personality; she can be a little bit possessive. And aggressive.” “I’m just deeply attentive to what Bernadette needs,” argues Victy. “And what she doesn’t need. That man could have been a stalker! He was all up in your face!” “I was just calmly sitting on his lap,” says Byrne. “I admit his hand was well-placed.”
The two performers speak in vaguely east European accents but they won’t reveal where they’re actually from. “If I tell you I will have to kill you,” says Byrne. “That sort of thing.” Beat’s intent on staying alive so back to the show: over the last few Australia has gotten hot and bothered with Eastend Cabaret’s offerings, Notoriously Kinky, Dirty Talk and Sexual Tension. Crikey describes them as ‘a high-powered feminine Flight of the Conchordsdipped in acid and drenched in smut.’ It seems that we just can’t get enough of these two; they’re coming to Melbourne after a riotous season in Adelaide. But we need to watch out. There was a bit of bum baring in Perth, apparently. “I was riding a Man Beast,” explains Byrne. “They’re big brawny bearded men over there; he was a huge miner. He was wearing low cut shorts. They started to slip. He exposed himself.” “There was a lot of arse,” notes Victy. “In the end he enjoyed it.” “”Everyone did,” says Byrne.
Who would they consider to be influences on their performance? “80s power bands like Meatloaf,” says Byrne. “But don’t put that in.” “Yes, put that in,” says Victy. “Meatloaf. And Tim Curry in Rocky Horror. David Bowie because of weird laser sounds; always weird laser sounds,” she adds. “And Freddie Mercury, he was very cool; he played a lot of instruments. And Prince.” Victy is no slouch herself when it comes to multi-instrumentality; in one show she’s been known to play piano, loop pedal, violin, musical saw, kazoo and glockenspiel. “We have to carry about a shitload of instruments,” complains Byrne.
