EPA Victoria’s beach report claims that recent rain has caused stormwater pollution to the entire bay, rendering beaches from St Kilda to St Leonards and every in between unswimmable.
The EPA monitors water quality at 36 Port Phillip Bay beaches with water samples collected at Beach Report sites every week during summer. Samples are tested to measure faecal contamination, which pose a danger to swimmers due to higher bacterial levels.
In other words, there’s too much shit in the water. Probably best to go see a gig instead.
#BeachReport forecast: POOR water quality at all Port Phillip Bay beaches today. https://t.co/Gbe4mxOrH2 pic.twitter.com/l4qtau5Qql
— EPA Victoria (@EPA_Victoria) January 19, 2017