Tertiary Links

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Competition closes: Nowhen in particular

Another savagely comic work from Neil Labute about the perfidy of the human beast. Four repugnant characters, four far-too-recognisable relationships, insults that draw blood, raunchy sexual slurs, face-crushing fights and the death of an innocent pet fish. 
Venue: The Wilde, 153 Gertrude Street, Fitzroy
Dates: September 28 - October 4 (except Monday)
Times: 8pm (extra show at...

Competition closes: Nowhen in particular

Dr. Pam Rana is here to perform the Heimlich manoeuvre on our social psyche which is being choked by a cultural meatball known as Kim Kardashian. The doctor will perform this emergency procedure en masse, freeing neural pathways by creating a forceful expulsion of air and sound (also known as laughter). In this side-splitting multimedia slide show she will dissect how eco-catastrophes are...

Competition closes: Nowhen in particular

Beatlemania is set to sweep Melbourne again when the musical comedy show A Hard Day's Night of Beatles Parodies hits the stage. The show will be a Magical Mystery Tour where The Beatles' timeless tunes Come Together with amusing, clever lyrics from musical funny man Stew Walker. Stew's Beatles parodies poke fun at modern life – from myki, hipsters and politicians to celebrities, ageing and...

Competition closes: Nowhen in particular

Show Stopper, a solo show by queer artist Agent Cleave, takes its name from a song by the remorselessly independent singer/songwriter Peaches. “I got her blessing and her respect to call this Show Stopper,” says performer, gender bender and provocateur, ‘drag assassin’ Agent Cleave. Cleave worked alongside Peaches for six years, opening shows in front of thousands and thousands of fans,...

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When I was in Grade Four I read Parvana’s Journey. Inspired by the story of a young girl's journey in search of her family, somewhere in war-ravaged Afghanistan, I decided to write my own version in English class. Seeing as I’ve lived in Melbourne my whole life, I really had nothing to go off and it basically ended up a shortened version of the story with my name in place of Parvana’s. Luckily...

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Apparently, there are people writing about music outside of the hallowed halls here at Beat. Christian Ryan has put together a bunch of these pieces featuring tales of rock’n’roll mischief, mayhem and mystery, all authored by a luminary collection of Australia’s finest music writers. so tell us your best mischievious musical tale to claim a copy of this must-have slice of Aussie music history...

Competition closes: Nowhen in particular

1,000 songs in a one hour show? Sounds, if not impossible, then unlikely. But Grant Busé, musical comedy performer, isn’t giving too much away. The Shuffle Show features two musical performers, Busé and his musical comedy buddy Elena Gabrielle, who do live performances of 1,000 songs during the course of The Shuffle Show. Really? “Come along and find out,” Busé says. “We are fighting time in...

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It's the year 2042. The film industry as we know it is dead - out of money and out of ideas. A has-been producer and an ambitious young screenwriter believe they’ve hit the jackpot when a mysterious femme fatale offers them the rights to a little-known '60s television show - a property they can use to revive mega-budget movie franchises. But turning the adventures of Selma the Dutiful...

Competition closes: Nowhen in particular

Be a ghost hunter for the evening on the Old Melbourne Ghost Tour. Lantern Ghost Tours are revealing the dark side of the capital during this year’s Melbourne Fringe Festival. Put your walking shoes on and journey back in time through Melbourne's hidden laneways and haunted locations. Hear of our most famous ghost, opera singer Federici, who plummeted to death in front of his audience. Learn...

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Miss Fletcher, motivator, inspirer, teacher. Fresh from the Edinburgh Fringe and winner of the People's Choice Award at New Zealand Fringe Festival, Miss Fletcher Sings the Blues is a musical comedy with educational benefits. A well-meaning, but slightly unhinged music teacher treats an unwitting geography class to a surprise music lesson. Tackling the big issues of the world, her songs such...

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Placebo is the second season for Melbourne City Ballet for 2014/2015, providing a showcase of classical, contemporary and neoclassical movement featuring the works of choreographers Yui Masukawa, Brendan Bradshaw, Michael Pappalardo and Alexandra Tylee. The works will be performed by the dancers of Melbourne City Ballet, Melbourne's newest neo-classical dance company with a focus on developing...

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Phantom Panda Power Wizard Master Smasher is a multimedia detonation performing outrageous music in sync with projected cartoons. It features astonishing musical virtuosity, smoke machines, bubbles, fireworks, lasers and just the right dash of brutality.  Incorporating world and contemporary tunes, Bugs Bunny as you’ve never seen the wabbit and a freakishly disconcerting light show, Phantom...

Competition closes: Nowhen in particular

They've torn up the bible, they've eaten the dogs - Auckland-based alt-folk act Bond Street Bridge continue a wildly successful run with their multimedia folk-singing spoken-word storytelling. Using original folk songs, heritage images and haunting new illustrations to tell the extraordinary tales of Captain Scott, Ernest Shackleton and the Heroic Age Of Antarctic Exploration, the band have...

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Fresh from their European dates with Amanda Palmer, Berlin’s Prince and Princess of Indie Rock and Europop return to Melbourne to launch their new album Eurosmash! Astrid and Otto are Die Roten Punkte (The Red Dots). Orphaned as kids when Astrid was 12 and Otto was nine, the brother and sister duo found shelter in a Berlin squat and never rockin’ well looked back. Eurosmash! is Die Roten...

Competition closes: Nowhen in particular

This Can’t End Well is hardly the most hopeful title for a show, but writer/performer/ improviser/self-proclaimed nut-job David Innes reckons his Fringe Festival debut is quirky and humorous enough to belie its name. “It’s three stories intertwined,” Innes explains. “Three characters are coming out, looking for love or coping with depression.” Innes will perform the three characters himself....

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Developed by a troupe of some of Melbourne’s best up and coming aerialists, Twisted Tales For The Cynical Viewer is a re-telling of well loved fairytales without the happily ever after. Featuring performances in lyra, aerial hammock, pole dancing, hula hoops and cabaret, this is circus at its storytelling best. Once upon a time some cynical aerialists grew tired of happy endings. Why does the...

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Plan B is a solo circus piece created and performed by Thomas McDonald. Using circus and physical comedy, Plan B explores that space we often find ourselves inhabiting but can't really explain. It’s a place created due to lack of planning, bad luck, poor life choices, and necessity. Plan B promises to be a unique, intimate and entertaining approach to modern circus. 
Venue: Gasworks, 21...

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Bobby is an outsider. He doesn't quite fit in with his peers, he's certainly not welcome at work and the less that's said about his family life, the better. But where Bobby does find a shred of happiness is in his love for the animal kingdom. All parts of the animal kingdom. Directed by James Dalton and featuring Heath Ivey-Law, Awkward Conversations with Animals I've Fucked is the second time...

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The year is 1968, the peak of the Vietnam War or at least that’s what Charlie thinks. Charlie is a Vietnam War enthusiast whose backpacking adventures and one too many viewings of Apocalypse Now have taken him to a dark place. Convinced he is stationed in a bunker on the brink of the Vietnam War, there is only one way out of his delusion – stand-up comedy. Featuring many true stories and...

Competition closes: Nowhen in particular

He’s not the sixteenth President of the United States or a vampire slayer, and he’s definitely not a ridiculous combination of both, but like Honest Abe he sports a kickass beard and makes his own brand of bullshit-free indie rock. He’s a young bloke named Lincoln le Fevre, hailing from the Derwent River in Tasmania and together with The Insiders, he’s heading to the honestly much better city...

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Since winning the coveted Perrier Best Newcomer Award in 1997 Arj has firmly established himself as one of the golden boys on the international comedy circuit. He performed massive sell out seasons at last year’s Adelaide Fringe Festival and Melbourne International Comedy Festival, as well as a four-month tour around regional Australia. Join Arj as he digs through his notes and tries to figure...

Competition closes: Nowhen in particular

The people who brought you the multi-award winning, critically acclaimed sensation Wolf Creek the Musical present a show based on the 1956 West German film Die Trappe Familie and, legally, nothing else.  Featuring soon to be classics like Maria, You're a Terrible Nun and The Hills are Alive with the Sound of Nazis. Don’t miss the next instalment from this team who delivered a sell-out smash...

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If you’re anything like me (poor you) and you spend too much time with your TV and a bag of chicken Twisties, then Donnell Rawlings may well be familiar to you. Having owned the catchphrase “I’m rich, biii-atch,” on Chappelle’s Show, had a turn as an ex-con on The Wire, and even made guest appearances as a challenge judge on The Ricki Lake Show, Rawlings is now bringing his unchained brand of...

Competition closes: Nowhen in particular

What do Pablo Escobar and Tijuana Cartel have in common? They both sling the finest dope going around. If you wanna see the Cartel boys at their breaky, trip-hoppy best, tell us just how good you are at slinging dope for your chance to score two free tickets to their Howler show on Friday September 12. 

Competition closes: Nowhen in particular

If you’re like me, the word ‘Conan’ conjures images of Arnie in leather, on a horse, with a sword. For fans of the band Conan, it conjures images of interplanetary thunder amplified through the roaring black hole anus of Azathoth. If you’d like to experience the latter more than the former, Beat has two tickets to give away for their first Aussie tour with Yanomamo. And hell, who doesn’t want...

Competition closes: Nowhen in particular

If you had the pleasure of being raised by Pommy parents, you would’ve found out pretty early on that your upbringing was far from normal. Cups of tea instead of juice for breakfast, and salt and vinegar ‘crisps’ in your sandwich. The main difference between me and the majority of kids in school was instead of watching Cheez TV on a Saturday or having a crush on Chad Michael Murray, I watched...

Competition closes: Nowhen in particular

I met a couple once who flew from Perth to Melbourne just to see Biffy Clyro. They totally thought it was worth it, and even conceived their second child after the show. True fact. If you can get yourself to The Palais on Sunday September 7, we’ve got two free passes for you so you can save the ticket price for your unconceived child’s education instead. For your chance to win tell us how far...

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One half of '80s duo Everything But the Girl, Ben Watt shares a remarkably intimate portrayal of his parents in his new memoir Romany and Tom. Watt will also discuss his creative output as musician, record producer, DJ and author in conversation with Ben Birchall. It takes place on Saturday August 23 and we have some double passes to give away. For your chance to win, tell us the title of your...

Competition closes: Nowhen in particular

One of the world's biggest DJs is returning to Melbourne.
 
Touted as the world’s number one DJ by dance music bible DJ Mag, they don't get much bigger than Hardwell. Last in Australia in March one of Future Music Festival tour, this October will see the Dutch heavyweight bring his ‘I AM Hardwell’ to our shores, which he's recently toured everywhere from Jakarta to Johannesburg and...

Competition closes: Nowhen in particular

When John Murry was 15 his adoptive parents decided he wasn’t going to live up to their Ivy League standards and instead checked a boy who had smoked pot about three times and been drunk maybe four or five into rehab. When I was 15, my best friend checked herself into rehab because you got all the free Fruit Loops you could eat and got to sit around all day playing PS2. Rehab obviously...

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